Vagin-Oga
I’ll keep this post short, taut, and sweet.
I enrolled in a class called “Vagin-Oga.” It’s Yoga, but for your vagina.
Many of you might be wondering what goes on here and why this is happening. Let me just start by saying I live in Southern California, and this is the kind of thing you have to do to keep up with everyone. It all started with yoga, and now there’s like 79 different types of yoga. Yoga for meth addicts, yoga for babies, yoga for dogs.
Well now there’s yoga for your jackpot.
We do a series of vaginal stretches to free it of any bad spirits. Then we put on some soothing music and talk to our lady parts. When the instructor rings a bell, we contract our genital muscles to strengthen them.
The class is always jam-packed with people, and it sure has changed my life. I’m not as angry or bitter anymore, and I drink less soda now. I’ve also given up garlic and onions for obvious reasons.
Right now I’m just a beginner, so I won’t show any pictures, but when I’m stronger, I might include some.
Namaste.
April 8, 2008 at 9:59 pm
One of the many reasons I left Southern California some 15 years ago was to get away from all this craziness.
April 8, 2008 at 10:16 pm
I will now look for a Penislates class ASAP
April 8, 2008 at 10:19 pm
i’m glad my class finally caught on down there…
April 8, 2008 at 11:07 pm
Yoga for the lady-parts….what will they think up next?
April 8, 2008 at 11:35 pm
Please, before and after shots, so we get the full effect of your soon to be tranformation.
April 9, 2008 at 12:03 am
This might become a reality, if given time.
But until that time comes, can I have a free demonstration?
Thomas
April 9, 2008 at 1:32 am
Oh, the things I could say to this…..but I won’t. Well, yes I will.
So, when you enroll….are noseplugs included? I mean, dude, that’s not right.
April 9, 2008 at 5:46 am
“We do a series of vaginal stretches to free it of any bad spirits.”
I’ve encountered a few mean-spirited vaginas in my day. Not pretty. One actually growled at me and said in a haunting voice, “Get Out!”
April 9, 2008 at 5:54 am
What about your M & M’s?? Don’t they get a mmmmyoga class too? Now that would be worth watching!
April 9, 2008 at 10:54 am
You’re taking the p*ss, right? Surely? LOL!
April 9, 2008 at 11:28 am
It would be interesting to go to one of your classes…
April 9, 2008 at 11:35 am
my neighbor is always talking to her lady parts, i hear her when im out in the yard. now at least i know there is a name for it. she cries alot, also.
April 9, 2008 at 2:17 pm
I’m curious Leaks….can your instructor do anything for my Man Friend’s manly parts? If there’s Yoga for a vagina, CERTAINLY there’s a Penile Institution out there that can help my man. This is one tim in which I hope he STRETCHES the truth.
April 9, 2008 at 2:23 pm
Leaky, what kinds of things do you say when you’re talking to your jackpot?
Iagree that it’d be most beneficial to your loyal readers to see before and after photos.
April 9, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Now I’ve heard it all
April 9, 2008 at 2:56 pm
People pay for this!
April 9, 2008 at 6:15 pm
A new study indicates that people that perform Vagin-Oga are 10 times more susceptible to org-spasms.
April 9, 2008 at 8:22 pm
OOoooommmmmmmy! I don’t really trust myself to comment here, but I am strangely drawn to type something in the box.
Stangely drawn? In the box? See what I mean?
As Booboo Bear once said “Look Yogi! It’s a nice pick-a-nick basket!”
I guess anything that gets the ol’ kundalini flowing is a good thing.
April 9, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Good news…vaginoga.com is available! You should totally get your instructor online.
I’ll require a slight finder’s fee, of course.
April 10, 2008 at 12:56 am
That is just awesome. I love it.
April 10, 2008 at 12:58 am
Good on ya, Barcs. Ease yourself into it and you’ll soon master the Downward-Facing Doggie Style.
April 10, 2008 at 1:05 am
haha i’m glad you found something that interests you.
check out bre101 at http://www.bre101.wordpress.com
join in on the crazy world of bre10!
please read my newest post
on the perved guy.
i’m really upset.
April 10, 2008 at 1:07 am
Interesting. This is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing. Googling it now. Thanks!
April 10, 2008 at 3:39 am
how is that i checked this site like an hour ago and there wasnt even a post and now theres one here with 24 comments? If i was a cute girl talking about Cooch-aerobics you can bet I’d have 30 comments by now!
I cannot do a push up with my penis. If I could I would include pictures. But you’d have to get thru a CAPTCHA to view them and they’d be blurry and unconvincing.
April 10, 2008 at 2:49 pm
Yoga for your jackpot. Classic.
I wonder if we have yoga for our jackpot?
April 10, 2008 at 4:42 pm
In these troubled times, I feel safer knowing about this. After all, loose lips sink ships.
Myself, I do anal bleaching. They really must redesign the spout of the Clorox jug, though, you know?
April 10, 2008 at 5:46 pm
“After all, loose lips sink ships.” Cristovao ~ You are a riot!
April 11, 2008 at 12:21 am
I knew there was some reason I continue to read your blog. It’s because I think deep, profound, thoughts when I read your posts (so to speak). Though there’s always a danger I may be so inspired that I have a tantram while reading it.
April 11, 2008 at 5:57 am
“i don’t eat garlic now, for obvious reasons.”
i wanna join too!
April 12, 2008 at 3:24 pm
I’m looking for a local Vagin-Oga group immediately! Now that I’m getting older, The Vaginaerobics classes that I’ve been taking are becoming just a little too high impact.
April 12, 2008 at 4:33 pm
Hey girl, I have been doing penis-oga for years. I am self taught which is good because they are not that trendy in Oslo so I have to do it on my own. I tried doing it at the gym and they called the police so I only do it at home now, or in the office toilets.
April 12, 2008 at 5:50 pm
You might be onto something with this. You should open your own studio. If you did open a studio…what would you name it?
April 12, 2008 at 10:14 pm
This is much classier than Vogue-a:
(Madonna scares the children)
April 14, 2008 at 5:40 am
Excuse me, but are you too much of an internet star to respond to comments now?
But seriously, your response to the comments was as funny as your original posts. I miss them. =/
April 16, 2008 at 6:03 am
Would it help these women?
http://paulmct.wordpress.com/2008/02/18/youd-better-like-oral-sex/